#i hope that's enough spoiler tags ;0;

[grimm-writings]

YIPPEE YOUR REQUESTS ARE OPEN AGAIN can i get a scenario where chilchuck slowly falls in love with a gender fluid reader? maybe he’s confused about their presentation at first, but then finds himself attracted to their masc and fem sides :0

two sides of the same coin

…ft! chilchuck x genderfluid! reader

…tags! fluff, end of manga spoilers, implied bisexual chilchuck, the mortifying ordeal of having to explain your identity to someone not in the know

…wc! 935

…notes! this request makes me so happy, because i’m also genderfluid!!! i’ll be using primarily my own experiences with my gender here, so i hope it’s to your liking! happy pride month!!! <3 

“So, you’re… everything.”

“Yes! I guess you can say that.  Although it’s more like it varies.”  Your hands move in the air to communicate your point.  “Sometimes I’m a girl, sometimes a boy.  But I’m also sometimes both, or sometimes neither!  Or maybe I’m partially a girl and partially neither, or I’m partially a boy and partially neither.  And then, on the rare occasion, I am everything!”

You can only watch in real time as Chilchuck slowly loses brain cells.  You’d fear that he may not be able to readily accept you, same as the rest of your party.  The reaction was positive enough (though Marcille and Senshi particularly need time to adapt properly) but there’s still lingering confusion.

Chilchuck slowly nods, though you can tell he isn’t exactly grasping it yet.  “So… What am I meant to call you?”

He’s trying to keep his language respectful.  That’s more than you can say for others you came out to.  You can tell Chilchuck is trying, even if this is unfamiliar ground for him.  He might know enough about different romantic and sexual preferences, and maybe more simple means of gender transition.  Your identity is… hard to explain to someone not in the know, though.

“Just ask,” you reply.  “I might have some indicators in clothing that could help.  Like…”  You gesture towards your current outfit.  “I’m presenting pretty masculine at the moment, yeah?”

“Yeah…” You don’t miss how Chilchuck eyes you up and down.  “So I should keep an eye out for how you dress?”

“Precisely!”  You snap your fingers into a point at Chilchuck’s face.

“Don’t do that.”

You drop your hand.  “Sorry.”

Chilchuck leans back on his seat, folding his arms over his chest.  If he was being honest, this only makes his heart confused.  He was already more used to you presenting masculine throughout your dungeon crawl.  You did express occasional disdain for your current dress, but can’t do much about it.  That in of itself made him wonder if he liked guys.  Now you’re saying you’re a girl sometimes?  Or neither?  Or everything?  He can’t even imagine you in a dress without his mind screaming at him in embarrassment.

You take in Chilchuck’s expression.  Brow furrowed, clearly trying to process your explanation.  He’s definitely accepting of it, just confused.  If there was a way you can explain it better to him…

An idea flashes through your mind with an “ah!”

Chilchuck perks up at your sudden yelp, blinking.  “Something the matter?  Wh– Hey, what are you doing?!”

You had practically scampered on all fours to where your travel bags were, digging around for something.  A few seconds pass before… “GOT ONE!”

Returning to Chilchuck’s side, you hold up one of the gold coins in… someone’s possession.  The half-foot cocks an eyebrow at it.  “What’re you getting at here?”

“This coin is still the same coin when it’s flat in my hand like this,” you begin, before flipping it over.  “Or when it lands on tails.”

Chilchuck watches as you place the coin on your thumb, and flip it up into the air only to let it land randomly, 50/50 chance each time.

“I can’t control whether it lands on heads or tails.  Sometimes it does something really peculiar and stands on its side, or it’s on a slant in some way.”

You watch as the gears turn in Chilchuck’s mind.  “So you can’t really control how your gender works, sometimes you just… feel a certain way?”

“Exactly!  My dysphoria – that’s the term for feeling uncomfortable – can fluctuate, but it’s still the same coin.  It’s still…”

“It’s still you,” Chilchuck finishes, turning his head to look up at you with understanding finally brightening in his eyes.  You can’t help but fluster a little.

It’d be a while since then until you’d make it back to the surface.  Everyone is as accommodating as ever to use the right pronouns when you tell them what for.  It soon comes naturally to just let you live as you are.  It’s welcoming and warm with everyone.

A nice spring breeze blows through your skirt as you make your way down to the entrance of the forest where the feast takes place.  You can spot your party from a mile away, your boots hitting the dirt path as you run over.

“Leave some for me!”  You exclaim in greeting, causing your friends to turn their heads.  Marcille gasps in wonder as she takes in your appearance, meanwhile Izutsumi makes a small noise in surprise.

Chilchuck is stunned into silence, and you can just tell the tips of his ears are going red before he keels over and spits out his drink onto the grass.  “W-What are you wearing?!”

“A dress, Chilchuck,” you quip back, sitting in between him and Marcille.  “Laios still being harassed by Yaad and the rest?”

“Hang on, we’re not moving on from this so fast!  Let me look at you!”  Marcille adjusts herself so she can inspect your look.  “I didn’t think you’d suit a dress so well!  Where’d you get that petticoat?”

You are about to answer when Izutsumi interrupts; “you look so… different,” she relays.

A sheepish chuckle escapes you, as you turn to Chilchuck, who has since been staring at you.  He blinks once you perceive him and glances away.  “You’re still you.  It…  You look very… you. It's nice.”

You can’t help but laugh at his flustered attitude, leaning down to kiss the top of his head as he gives out to you.

You are accepted, and you are loved.  What place could possibly be better than here?

[riitah]

[lover's quarrel] - gojo satoru x fem!reader

*sorry, i forgot to tag this: spoilers for jjk 0, but it's only mentioned in like one sentence and it's a very small detail SYNOPSIS: you and gojo got into your first argument as a couple, but you didn't expect him to come forward to apologize first. WORD COUNT: 1.3k HONORABLE MENTION: special thanks to my beta reader “henry rumpelstiltskin III of the nuclear sock kingdom”! :DD AUTHOR'S NOTE: egocentric fictional men who apologize first>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> - (he'd apologize first because I said so) - (he'd also be so embarrassed about it because i said so) - (because y'know. he probably never apologizes first. except this time.) - (holy crap i hope this isn't too ooc like i've never seen him get into an argument with anyone before 😭😭😭)

You. The couch. And the deafening silence.

It wasn't like you and Satoru haven't gotten into arguments before; back in high school, he loved to bother the crap out of you when you were busy doing something that required your full attention, and many of these button-pushing sessions led to full-blown arguments where the two of you hurled insult after insult at each other (though they were more of a one-sided thing, because he just laughed at you and your reddening face, asking if that was all you got). And Shoko and Suguru would watch all the while, one enjoying the entertainment she was getting and the other patiently waiting for a moment where he could calm the both of you down.

But this argument was different. It wasn't some small fight between teenagers that the two of you would forget in a few days. Heck, it might even last a few days instead, now that Suguru wasn't here.

Suguru.

You sighed, remembering that you fought with him, too. Figuratively and literally.

You sunk into the soft seat and leaned your head against the back cushion, letting out a loud groan.

Should I just apologize and get this over with?

After all, knowing your boyfriend, he'd be way too prideful to say sorry first.

Right. Boyfriend. Maybe even soon-to-be ex-boyfriend.

You tightly clutched the hem of your shirt at the thought, your heart feeling heavy. The remnants of the feud buried themselves deep into your chest, pulling and clawing at it as if it was trying to rip something out of there. It hurt knowing that the relationship you were once so happy to establish might not last as long as you thought it would.

Your best friend and your boyfriend; two heartbreaks, two people lost.

You bit your lip, trying to hold back tears. The room gradually grew darker and darker as the sun set in the distance, a painful reminder to you that Satoru had been gone for hours. Pulling your knees to your chest, you rocked back and forth, wondering where he could be this late.

Certainly not at some club, right...?

Your stomach twisted in a way you couldn't explain, and you let out a choked sob.

He can't be. He's not like that.

But Satoru had never been romantically involved with anyone before you. So how did you know what to expect?

You felt your fingernails digging into your skin, hard enough to make it bleed. You hated the way the scenarios were running through your head, the way none of them were him coming home to you without smelling of sickly sweet perfume and without having lipstick stains all over his neck. It was truly a different kind of pain knowing that someone who had declared his love for you merely six hours before could take it all back in an instant.

This is all so, so stupid. Maybe this was a mistake from the start.

Grabbing your coat that was lying right next to you, you stood up to leave.

Maybe a break would serve the both of us some good.

You put it on, not bothering to zip up the front.

I never should've said yes.

You walked towards the door, your footsteps soft, hesitant, and gradually slowing down to a stop when you arrived. You reached for the doorknob, still unsure of your decision. Your hand hovered in midair as you looked down at your feet, warm tears still streaking down your cheeks.

Is this really the right thing to do?

You couldn't think straight, or pinpoint what exactly you felt. Anger? Worry? Dread? The different emotions were all mixed into one, forced down your throat and into the pit of your stomach, with the sole purpose of breaking you from inside out.

You didn't want to think about anything anymore.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath before wrapping your hand around the doorknob, and--

The door flew backwards, striking against your palm. Your eyes opened in surprise, darting from the doorknob to the tall man that stood in front of you.

Neither of you said a word.

You were rooted to the spot, your legs frozen. Beads of sweat rolled down your back, tickling you, futilely trying to distract you from the situation at hand. Your hands felt clammy, your breath was stuck uncomfortably in your throat, and a single tear awkwardly slid its way down the side of your face, seemingly not getting the memo.

Satoru stared back at you, his sunglasses sitting on the bridge of his nose, slightly crooked. His blue eyes blinked at you, with a hint of confusion behind them. He was also slightly panting, you realized as you saw his shoulders slightly heave up and down from the corner of your eye.

"...(Y/N)?" His voice was gentle, void of any anger, unlike the tone he had used with you just hours before.

You didn't reply in fear of breaking down in front of him, in fear of coming off as some kind of victim when the fault was yours as much as it was his.

"What are you... Were you leaving? Were you crying?"

He sounded so confused, so worried. He touched your wet cheek, brushing against it with his calloused hand.

"Toru, where were you?" Your voice was barely audible.

One second passed. And then two.

Please tell me that you didn't give up on us.

And then three. And four.

The silence dragged on. And your hope dwindled along with it.

"Toru, I..." you said hoarsely.

Your heart dropped when you finally smelled the faint trace of perfume. The very same sickly-sweet smell you had been afraid of.

It can't be.

Can it?

"Were you...kissing some other girl?" Your voice cracked a little.

"What?! No!" His eyes widened as he frantically shook his head, and then he exhaled and furrowed his brows. "Was that why you were crying?"

You nodded meekly, feeling as though you were about to cry all over again. "I thought you'd want to break up with me."

"I'd never." You felt his lips press against your forehead, the warmth still lingering even after he pulled away. "And..." He dropped his hand to his side and glanced away, preoccupied with something on the floor, his voice quiet, sincere. "I'm...sorry."

Now it was your turn to widen your eyes. Did he just...apologize?

He peeked at you, and then grinned when he saw your expression. "Dumbfounded, aren't you? You should be honored to be the first and only person I've ever apologized t--mmph!"

All of the sadness seemed to have evaporated from your body as you grabbed his face with one hand, bringing it close. "Do that again."

He squinted at you. "I got you flowers," he suggested, squirming in your grasp. "And perfume too, so if you smell that on me, that's probably from the shop." A pause, waiting for you to let go. "And chocolate." Another pause, a smirk forming on his face. "Sexy lingeri--?"

You gave him a deadpan stare before he could finish.

"Kidding, kidding! Obviously." He laughed, the sound filling your stomach with butterflies. "So does that mean you forgive me?"

You sighed, nodding, letting go of him. "I'm really sorry, too. It was a stupid thing to argue over."

"Well, that marks the end of our first lover's quarrel!" He readjusted his glasses and smiled at you before bringing his left hand out from behind his back. "Good thing, because my arm was about to start cramping--"

You didn't register the rest of his words as he showed off the items he bought for you, your mind still trying to process what had just happened.

Toru knows how to apologize...

Surprised? Happy? Maybe giddy? Or all three?

You let a giggle slip, and he turned to you, the bouquet of flowers in his hands raised like a trophy.

"What're you laughing at?"

"Nothing."

You pulled in by the collar for a taste of his soft lips, whispering against them a quiet "I love you."

[tavyliasin]

The Doors to the House of Hopeful Sinners are OPEN

Hello darlings~ The doors to my experimental server are now opening, following the success of the experiment~ (I know the banner isn't particularly original yet but we're open to submissions to replace it!)

The House of Hopeful Sinners is an open and inclusive 18+ FanServer for Baldur's Gate 3, with a focus on creative fanworks and supporting fellow fan creators!

To learn more about the server and what we hope to create together, please Read More below! (NSFW Content and Humour Follow)

HOHS Server Principles

A general summary of the server is that it is a space to allow creativity to flourish. We are LGBTQIA+ and NeuroDivergent Friendly, our motto is something along the lines of "Horny But Wholesome", or "Spicy Kindness". Do be aware we do not currently spoiler mark any storylines, endings, or game details, so you may wish to finish everything in the game unless you're fine with spoilers. Some of what we have to offer:

Almost all channels are NSFW, hornyposting 24/7 is free for all to enjoy if you so wish. No judgement! BE FREE!

Dedicated forums for FanArt and FanFiction, so you can share and search for your own works or those by others.

Forums for reference materials and lore discussion to use for fanworks.

Optional ping roles to be alerted to new content with your favourite characters!

Starboard including NSFW Channels!

Specific channels and threads for discussing niche and triggering kinks where those who enjoy them can engage safely.

Clear list of CWs and rules to tag and spoiler hide content containing potentially triggering content.

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A selection of custom emojis, stickers, and soundboards!

A community who will welcome you whether you only drop by a little or visit often. Lurkers welcome~ Enjoy the space however you wish.

Space to grow! We are more than willing to hear feedback and build our space around the needs of the community.

Simple age verification. Open a ticket to verbally confirm your age with a moderator, no photo ID needed. This is trust, and breaking it is an immediate lifetime ban. Having under 18s around is not safe for minors or for the adults. If you're too young, please respect this and wait. We will never knowingly allow a minor into this space.

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Server Reviews!

You don't just have to take my word from it, listen to these reviews from satisfied community members!

1/5 stars. "Not enough Raphael." - A. Devilyoudo 5/5 stars. "Like 24/7 Horny Jail, now with a token SFW channel!" - I.C.U. Peekin 3/5 stars. "Server owner clearly needs more sleep." - B.D. Thyme 5/5 stars. "Finally, a place where I have threads for less common kinks!" - I.P. Freely 3/5 stars. "The creative energy gave me kinks I didn't know I had so now I have that to deal with." - Sweet E Pye 5/5 stars. "Everyone is so feral I'm making a fortune." Mr Phucks, Cage Chewer Dentistry 0/5 stars. "These degenerates have changed my brain chemistry and all I can think of is eating Gortass." - Tsun Derriere 5/5 stars. "I've accidentally become the Fairy Smutmother to a bunch of brats and couldn't be happier." - Tavylia of House Sin, first of her na- (script cuts off) 3/5 stars. "A good selection of smut content but I'm too scared to talk to everyone." - Lou King (respectfully) 2/5 stars. “I’ve seen less horny pornography. I had to turn off my message previews so I didn’t give my coworkers hypernatremia at the sheer volume of cum present.” - Michael Toris 5/5 Stars. “I think I’m growing a prostate where my frontal lobe used to be. Think Durge is into skullfucking?” - Illa D. Vized 5/5 stars. "A full range of penis emojis." - Forrest F. Cox 5/5 stars "There's a reason I'm here every day" - Leonardo DaVinci 5/5 stars. "I have learned things about prostates, cervical mucus, and fertility my health class never bothered with and there are big enough nerds here that there are NIH citations about it." - Prof G Dekarios

What Else is there in HOHS? Beta Readers

We have dedicated Beta Readers on a tag role - we would welcome more Beta Readers to help polish up our writers' works, though of course time is freely given and boundaries/CWs are always respected. You are under no pressure to beta. But what can that feedback look like? How does it help?

Editing is painful, but having useful feedback alongside fun and excited comments is a great way to make it a lot less horrible!

Treatos! WIP Feedback!

Sometimes to get things flowing we like to write "Treatos" - short paragraphs/drabbles not connected to full fics to help us get the creative mode moving again.

Most of all, we just welcome all Hopeful Sinners who share our values in fandom enjoyment~ I hope to see you there! - With Love, Tavylia Sin

Disclaimer - side effects of exposure to HOHS might include: - Gender Euphoria - Producing more creative works - Persistent feelings of self-worth - Hyperfixation go brr - Interest in characters you didn't look twice at before - Excessive Thirst

[ren-rambles-often]

"Love, or Something Ignites" might just be the best goyuu fic ever!!! let me explain!!! (Thoughts and Review)

Some quick context but cuz this review was already going to be pretty long without my flashback sequence so pls scroll down to the red text if you don't want to hear my history of opinions with JJK and its ships.

I've been deep in the goyuu tag since the beginning of the year, which I found kind of strange at first since I watched S1 way back in 2022 and did not give much of af about the whole show.

I kicked my feet a bit at SukuFushi,  tried to like it more, and even searched out a couple of fics but they just weren't giving AT ALL.

At the start of 2023 I watched jjk 0 and I was kinda hyped to get back into the show, but my shipping heart still ached for something to latch onto so I went on AO3 and picked up the first fic I found. Surprise, surprise, it was a goyuu fic featuring role reversal. I wouldn't say I liked it but it did tickle something in my brain I would have explored if I wasn't neck deep in my bakudeku era at the time.

Then S2 happened and it all just sorta clicked for me. Before then I'd mainly been a SukuIta believer, I didn't frequent their fics but I DID gobble up their twincest doujins like I was starved when I had the time. 2nd cour of S2 coming out practically sealed Goyuu for me, I'd always felt there was a bit of something I saw between them but Yuuji screaming out for Gojo in that last frame...just...*chef's kiss*

I didn't go back to rewatch S1 where a majority of their reactions were like some diehard fans would but the clips and screencaps I've come across now and again are enough to solidify for me that yes! They are made for each other!! (Hope the wrong stsg fans don't find this ◉‿◉)

I'd really love to go on and on about their dynamic but this was supposed to be about my February fic of the month, "Love, or Something Ignites" by lainebee.

Like I said, I've been deep in the tags and the only others I think that come close to this one are "No Sanctuary" by eddie01 and both world's sequels.

Now I'm not saying there aren't other good ones, like I'm just halfway through the hundred and something AO3 pages of their ship tag, so there's a lot I've yet to see. Still, this is a sorta subjective review and I just hope to spread the word of this masterpiece and maybe meet others who've read it so we can fan together in the comments.

(Now that's all out of the way, there will be mild spoilers and also warnings for; omegaverse, mpreg, and voyeurism so let's hop to it (✿^‿^)

The fic is set in a historical Japan au where Yuuji and Sukuna are brothers, with Sukuna being much older and ruling over a kingdom in the south. Thing is, he's constantly at war with the Gojo clan cuz these two mfs are just built like that in every verse. Shit happens and they come to a truce and as a sign of goodwill Sukuna offers Yuuji, his recently presented omega brother, as a gift (I honestly thought Yuuji was like 16 or 17 but he's 19 so like whatever idc (╥﹏╥)

"So what's the problem?" you might ask, well aside from the obvious marriage of convenience plot, Gojo doesn't give a fuck, he's still hung up on Geto (kinda tho, it's complicated but they aren't in love) and he's pretty much intended to go through it for show.

But that's not the end; not only do our boys have no feelings for each other and have never even met, but THING IS... Sukuna has demanded a public consummation cuz he's a bastard like that and we love him for it. Worry not there's no fucking on a stage for everyone to watch...just fucking in a 'room' for a handful of witnesses to watch from behind those dresser screen things (vocab not working lol).

The fic is definitely kinda long and tho there are some slow-burn vibes a lot of it essentially takes place in ONE FUCKING DAY. My first assumptions going into this were, "pacing issues???" and "oh the author is going to either insta love them, make them fuck and spend the rest of the fic doing fluff, or they will fuck with some angst then spend the rest falling in love."

Color me surprised when yeah, they did fuck but that was one or two chapters from the last of about nine.

You expect this kind of shit to feel rushed as fuck but the writing is so fucking divine that you never feel like putting it down. There's always so much going on but time is never wasted dwelling on one subject for too long, it's fast, it's funny, and the characters and setting are constantly giving the energy you know and love from the original show but probably two times better.

One of the things I noticed a few GoYuu writers struggle with is accurately reflecting Gojo cuz he's actually an enigma and arguably one of the most complex characters in the show with a broad range of emotions. He doesn't particularly fit one kind of vibe whereas for everyone else you can pick one or something close to it. Gojo on the other hand goes from one end of the spectrum to the other pretty quickly and that's super hard to capture and explore, especially when it comes to the shorter smutty fics (Not complaining too much tho, I live for the E rating.)

I love the direction the author chose to go with him, and it feels so true to his character, his immature but his teasing doesn't feel over the top or come off as exaggerated. His status as the strongest is just told but shown to us with the way he behaves and I like that we get instances of him getting work done despite knowing he's a rebel. It reminds us that yeah, he's working to make the clan the way he wants but he's just going along with what he has to in true Gojo fashion.

Yuuji, is totally something else, it's implied that he actually killed people...and I don't think we got a paragraph of him feeling guilt over it but that's somewhere toward the end so forget it. Yuuji is the absolute sweetest here and I adore every scene he's in along with how bratty he tends to be with Gojo. It's not frequent and most of the time he's pretty respectful but when he's not...Yeah. His inner thoughts and his conversations with most of the other characters really bring life to the story and you literally feel you're right there with him through it all.

Then there's the smut...oh. my. fucking. GOD. It's absolutely delicious. If you were iffy about it being omegaverse, I beg you to actually consider it cuz all probably more than four thousand words of it are fucking precious.

I had no idea I'd be into sex with some commentary when I began reading but the conversation from the characters picked was spot on and even added to the spicyness.

My favorite part is when Yuuji moans like a fucking pornstar and the zenin guy (forgot his disgusting ass name) goes "The boy is a whore."

Like boohoo bitch just say you wish you were getting all that, I wish I was (╥﹏╥)

If you're still iffy about the Omegaverse trust me it's not that big of a deal, the focus is mainly on Gojo and Yuuji trying to find some mutual ground to get on so the consummation isn't fucking awkward but by talking, joking, and getting to know each other something even more starts to blossom.

There are definitely traces of insta love but I personally see it as a weird mixture of attraction and possessiveness but this book is just like the prelude to the main course which is the second part in the series which I'm not done with yet but fucking hell...all the intrigue and tension that you will find in Love, or Something Ignites, gets doubled with more angst and mystery in the second fic, along with goyuu being stupid as well as stupidly in love.

So give it a try, and if you have, let me know what you think. I'd usually say where the tiny flaws are but for this book there are none...unless you count Yuta being Maki's mate instead of Rika's but that's my personal hill to die on. Let me know if there's a fic you want me to write about and I'll maybe get to it

Well, that's all from me today, it's 3 am and I'm fucking exhausted.

[damn-stark]

Chapter 13 It’s over isn’t it?

Chapter 13 of Sugar

A/N- I messed up the timeline dates, but it’s all fixed now so if you see some different dates it’s because of that, sorry.

Warning- Swearing, ANGST!!, Death, violence and mentions of blood, spoilers, mentions of abuse, long chapter.

Pairing- Suguru Geto x Gojo!fem-reader, (future) Choso x fem!reader

Takes place during- Jjk 0 movie

(Let me know if you want to be tagged)

————

*21 YEARS AGO*

“Mother, where’s Satoru?”

You were brought to a part of your own house you didn’t know, a place where all you felt was some lurking evil hiding past the huge stone door.

“He’s gone but he’ll be back after you do this,” she mutters nonchalantly.

You look up at her to try and look at her face for some comfort, even if she hardly gave you any, but she peers back at your father instead, letting you look down the hall for your older brother even though you know he wouldn’t just appear out of the blue. He’s been gone since you woke up, and every time you ask where he is you get some brief answer.

“What am I going to do?” You ask and look at the stone doors again. The same lurking evil grows intensely to the point you feel the hairs on the back of your neck rise, and goosebumps grow on your skin as a bad feeling knots your stomach. “Mother, I don’t like this. Where’s Satoru?”

Your mother's grip tightens around your hand and the stone door finally begins to open. You try to hide behind her as you feel the cold air unfurl over you and see the eerie darkness past the door, but your father then grabs your arm and snatches you away from her.

“Mother,” you call out with fear as your father pulls you inside the dark room.

“If you want to see your brother,” your father interjects in a cold voice. “You will exorcize this curse. Do you understand?”

Curse?

You try to pull back at the sound of that terrifying word, but he pulls back harder and quickens his pace down the stairs.

“No, Father,” you plead with a shaky voice.

“Enough crying, you’re a sorcerer, not some weak monkey,” he sneers and pushes you forward when he reaches the end of the stairs. “You will exorcize this curse or you will die. Do you want to die?” He snaps at you.

Tears crawl down your cheeks and your heart pounds faster. “Where’s Satoru?” You ask for the only person who comforts you. The only person who’d listen. “I don’t want to be here. Where’s Satoru?!” You cry out.

“He won’t save you!” Your father yells back before he turns around and begins to walk away, letting the curse he spoke of begin to chitter in the far corner of the room.

“No, father,” you call out fearfully and turn to run after him. When you reach his side you grab his long sleeve and he turns to face you, he grabs your hand, but he yanks it off and shoves you down the stairs, causing you to fall on the stone ground.

“Father!” You cry out and quickly drag yourself to your knees to desperately reach out for him. However, that man is cold, he doesn't look back, and he doesn’t say anything until he reaches the stone door.

“Kill that curse and prove your worth, daughter, if not you’ll never see your beloved brother again.”

He walks out the door and when it closes all you see is darkness. That’s all there is, a void of darkness and that chittering sound growing louder now that the light that casted inside is gone.

You try not to move, you keep yourself from crying any further hoping that the curse keeping you company would somehow ignore you. However, no matter how still you stay, no matter how quiet you try to be, you can hear claws clicking on the ground as it approaches. And that makes your heart pound so fast that it hurts your chest. You even begin to heave and cry more without trying to as you try to comfort yourself with the thought of your brother and the hope that he'll be here.

He’ll save you and kill that curse that you hear lurking closer. He promised after all.

“…I’m your big brother, I will always protect you.”

You ball yourself up and close your eyes while you cover your ears to wait for Satoru.

You wait and wait, but the curse gets closer, to the point you feel it breathing behind you. You continue to try and not move, but then you hear it open its jaw so an instinct to run away kicks in and you spring up to try and run up the stairs.

However, the curse is fast this time and crawls over to you as it chitters louder in the darkness. The moment you climb on the second stair it wraps its claws around your ankles and drags you down, making you cry out at the top of your lungs.

The curse then turns you around and you see its four yellow eyes piercing into you before you bellow out as you feel a sharp claw make a gash over your torso.

“Mother!” You cry out of desperation. “Satoru!”

Yet to no avail, so you try to kick the curse, but it pulls you off the ground and dangles you over its jaw. You cry out louder and try to swing any limb you can, but nothing hits, you can only feel yourself get closer to its smelly mouth. You can feel your short life coming to an end, so a memory of your brother appears in your mind. A happy one where you're playing outside together, where you see him smiling and hear him laughing.

You try to comfort yourself with that past memory, but it’s because of that memory that you feel a sense of desperation and inspiration hit you, causing your heart to skip a beat, and your fear to slowly turn to a desire to fight back.

Thus, you throw your hands out and aim your palms down at its mouth you feel yourself getting close to. The elemental cursed technique is something you barely started to train with, it’s hard to summon and use, but you tap in the fire technique deep inside yourself and manage to create large fireballs over your palms.

The curse lowers you past its teeth so you quickly shoot the fire out into its throat, causing it to shriek out and hurl you away. The impact against the cold stone hurts your entire body and makes the wound on your torso feel like you got slashed again. Albeit, you don’t give up, you get on your knees and summon the air you feel in the room to you, and make your hands glow red-orange as you summon fire to bask your hands this time. And when you see the piercing yellow eyes closer than before, you mix the air and fire and shoot them out like a wild wave.

The curse goes flying back and before it can hit the wall, the curse explodes and leaves you isolated.

The adrenaline that was just running in your body vanishes and tears run down your cheeks while sharp throbbing pain overwhelms you. You try to cry out for help, but all you can do is cry and hope for your big brother to come back soon.

——

*NOW*

“Y/N,” your brother says for the second time, but this time he says it with more disbelief as he notices how different the color of your eyes are.

The comfort he felt when he would meet your gaze every time before is gone as your iris’s gleam the same color as the flames you manipulate, instead of the color they were ten years ago and since the moment you were born. He felt like he was looking at a stranger.

Yet he still hoped that he could still find his home when he looked into your eyes like he would before, even if they are different.

“My, how different are your eyes, little sis,” Satoru interjects. “Contacts?”

You turn around completely and meet his familiar bright blue eyes with a pointed glare. “No,” you mutter. “These are my eyes…they changed after I fully came into realization of my cursed technique. No thanks to you.”

Satoru scoffs and puts his hands in his pocket. “Well you did leave,” he says, making you curl your lips to a scowl as you further narrow your glare.

“After you left me,” you snap at him and curl your hands into tight fists as your anger boils inside you, and an ache punctures your heart. “You left me there in that house…do you know what they did to me?” You ask as your eyes fill with tears of anger and frustration.

“You probably have a clue though, of how…they starved me for five days to weaken my mind. They only gave me enough water to survive.” You scoff with fake amusement, and Satoru blinks as his lips fall to a frown. He knew your parents would give you a hard time about Suguru, he knew they would try to turn you against him, but they were your parents too so he never actually imagined them doing what you’re telling him.

“And when I refused to obey our cousin's demands screwing in my head,” you sneer and try to hold back from crying as you recall those five torturous days. “They’d beat me. They hurt me to turn me against Suguru, all because YOU! Left me!” You yell at him and take a step towards him. “So why?” You ask.

And that’s when he sees it again. As your anger falters and tears slip out of your eyes, he sees that girl he grew up with, the girl he basically raised. Even if your eyes are orange-red, he still saw you as you pleaded so vulnerably for an answer you could only imagine over and over again for ten years.

“Why did you leave me?” You press

Satoru steps forward and his own eyes gleam brighter as tears cloud them. Yet he knew that no matter what he told you, how deeply he touched his heart to be sincere, that answer wouldn’t satisfy you. So he chooses not to answer. “Tell me, even if I didn’t leave, if I had taken you with me that day, would you still have left with him?”

You sniffle and fill yourself with rage once again as he responds with a question. “I don’t know,” you grumble and grab the bag to tighten the strap around your arm. “And now we’ll never know, will we?”

Satoru shakes his head stiffly. “No,” he says. “We won’t.”

You let out a deep breath and shift a leg back whilst you roll your wrist to open your hand and point your palm at the ground to get ready to fight him. “I’m leaving with these whether you like it or not,” you mutter.

Satoru takes one more step forward and sighs. “I thought you’d say that, so I’ll tell you. Leave those things there and leave y/n, I don’t want to hurt you.”

You scoff. “Ten years too late for that,” you counter and begin to tap into the dirt and the trees that lie outside the door behind your brother. “So it seems, dear brother, you’ll have to kill me if you want them back.”

Satoru pulls his hands out of his pocket and a small amused smirk tugs on his lips. “But it won’t be fair, and I don’t want you crying when you lose. You are a crybaby.”

You glare at him and snap at him. “Is this some joke to you? This is not some game, Satoru! And I’m not weak, I’m a lot stronger now.”

Satoru nods. “I know that,” he says.

“I won’t stop,” you say as you have vines crawl inside to creep toward Satoru’s legs since you know there’s a high chance his infinity is off right now. “Believe it or not,” you continue and step forward. “I’m looking out for you too, so you won’t have to risk your life anymore, so you can have a life outside of this job. You deserve that,” you say honestly. “So,” you snarl. “Dear brother, I’ll tell you this. Let’s give it all we got.”

Satoru’s smirk deepens and he fists his hands. You bend your legs to get in a fighting stance, and he mirrors you. Yet before either of you can charge at the other, the vines wrap around his ankles, proving your theory right, and you proceed to yank him out of the room.

When you get outside you quickly pick up a wave of dirt, and summon air to mix with it before you stomp your foot and throw your hands out to shoot out the wave of dirt towards him.

Satoru tries to dodge it like he would before, but the air helps the dirt wave travel faster, so it hits him and hurls him outside where you’ll have the advantage. He notices that and quickly lunges at you to push you back inside, but you quickly shift your body and do a swift cartwheel to move out of the way. When you’re back on your feet, you don’t hesitate to tap into the earth beneath your feet and lift 3 large chunks of rocks and dirt.

You then proceed to slowly move the three chunks of dirt around you, and Satoru uses this to his advantage to try and lunge at you. However, you throw a fist out and hurl a chunk at him.

Satoru of course swerves, and he dodges the second one you throw at him, just like the third. When he’s close to you, you pick up the first chunk of dirt that was left behind him and raise it off the ground. Satoru throws his fist, but you throw your head back and swiftly swing to the side. When Satoru notices he didn’t hit anything, he turns his head and parts his lips with surprise. He's about to say something, but you flick your wrist and throw him the large chunk of dirt and rock.

This time the chunk hits Satoru and hurls him back. You don’t wait to see if the rock landed on him, you try to leave since you know your opponent is stronger. But you then hear a blast, and as you glance over you see the chunk of dirt and rock exploding in little pieces, and your brother standing on his feet as he begins to chuckle.

“I’ve got to say,” he interjects. “I’m impressed!” He shouts and throws his arms out. “Ten years ago you couldn’t lift a pebble without breaking a sweat.” He snickers and wipes dirt off his cheek. “So I guess I’m going to stop playing now. Unless you want to give those curses back.”

You stiffly shake your head and before you know it your brother is over you in the blink of an eye.

You gasp and rapidly wrap your arm with flames, but he throws a left hook over your face that makes you falter, which hurts so much harder than ever before. It feels like being hit by something hard and sharp.

However, even if it breaks your nose and other bones on your face, you still try to throw a right hook, but he captures your arm and begins to squeeze it to the point you can feel pain as your bones break. And you can't say you didn't expect this much because you did, but it still catches you off guard how much harder he’s fighting against you.

Nevertheless, you manage to throw your hand out and wrap it around his throat since he still has his infinity off. You then gather wind below your feet and use it to throw you both up into the sky. And it's only once you’re mid-air, in between the clouds and over the school that Satoru lets go, letting you quickly heal your broken bones.

Satoru then tries to grab ahold of you again, but you gather air in between your hands and blast him further up. You proceed to counter and push the air down to your feet and flip around whilst you lash your brother down past you with the wind.

You continue to take advantage of the air all around you and keep striking air at him that hits him like blades. You don’t let him gain the upper hand and shift down to blast air out from your feet. However, just as it hits him it bounces off him. He’s using infinity now.

You grimace but don’t give up, you lean your body down and reach out for him as gravity pulls you back down. Satoru pushes himself and when he reaches you he grabs your throat and swings you around so you’re under him as you’re both falling back to the ground.

“Stop!” He bellows.

You throw your hand out and manage to hit his face and try to push him back, but his grip is tight and he keeps you in his grip. Thus you move your hand up and grab his hair to yank his big head to the side.

“Tsk!” He grimaces and tilts his head to bite down on your hand.

“Ew!” You bellow and shoot him a glare. “Did you just bite me?! Psycho!”

Satoru lets you go and snickers, making you knee him in the crotch. He doesn’t let go, so you knee him harder and he finally lets you go. “How many times have I told you!” He sneers. “Don’t hit me there!”

You try to turn in mid-air to try and gain the upper hand, but as you glance down you see you’re approaching the ground, so you just protect yourself with your cursed energy and crash into the ground hard.

You don't even try to recuperate afterward you try to get off the ground, but no matter how much energy you still have, you both hit the ground hard and linger on the ground to try and catch your breaths. Once you have some grasp of yourself you flip around and get on your knees to try and push yourself up, but then a hand wraps around your ankle. You don’t need to even look back to know it’s your brother.

“Leave them,” he grumbles.

You kick your foot back and hit his face. “No. They're not decorative pieces for this school to use!” You snap back and travel your fire to your foot.

“And what are you two gonna use them for?” He rebuttals. “To win your senseless war? You’ll use them too.”

“No,” you grimace and kick him again, but that doesn't affect him; he drags himself up and grabs the bag to yank back.

“They’ll have a choice,” you let him know and tug back. “They all will, but why do you care anyway?

“Because they’re curses!” He argues. “Aren’t those the same things you want to get rid of?!”

“Half curses,” you counter between gritted teeth. “They’re human too. And…no,” you deadpan and finally blast fire out of your foot, causing Satoru to snap his head away before the force hurls him back.

You quickly get back up, but he finds his footing, so you proceed to summon more fire to your hands and don’t hesitate to throw it at him over and over again. None hit him because of his infinity, but you continue to overwhelm him. And when he begins to get close you throw both of your hands out and cry out as you blast hot and bright flames out of your palms.

Of course, the flames bounce off his infinity, but you continue to push and blind his six eyes with your flames that bounce off his technique.

Satoru pushes back to try and get close to you, so you bend your knees and add more fuel to your fire, making it hard for him to walk as some flames begin to penetrate through his infinity. Which is why just as you see him begin to sweat by the heat of the flames, and just before he can try anything, you pass some cursed energy down to the earth. You then raise a pillar of dirt and rock from the ground that sends him flying back to the sky.

You don’t hesitate and use the wind to boot yourself above him in the air, and then gather wind around your foot to use against him.

However, just as you flip to throw a lash at him, he manages to grab your ankle and quickly flips you around to throw you back at the ground. And since you fail to land on your feet, he lands over you and grabs your shirt to pull you up, and begins to throw punches on your face. You try to block him, but he doesn’t falter, he throws jab after jab even as your nose bleeds and as he cuts your lip.

It’s not until you can’t handle the pain that you cry out with slight fear and disbelief. “Satoru!”

Your brother immediately stops with his fist in midair and blinks with disbelief as if he’s now realizing what he’s doing.

You meet his gaze with that same fear written all over your face and with your eyes clouded with tears, and he can’t help but see a flicker of home again. Even as different as your eyes are, he sees it, home, and his beloved little sister. But he also sees that pleading look in your eyes he saw when he left, that he saw only mere moments ago. And he can’t bring himself to bring his fist down again.

Yet you’re different, you’re fighting for something bigger. Plus you’ve been taught not to hesitate, when to pick to give into your emotions, and when to not. Even if you see that same brother you still so deeply love, even if you can feel like that gap in your heart is complete at his presence, there’s still much anger, too much disappointment, and your love doesn’t outmatch that. Thus you wrap your fist with air and use your technique when you punch his throat, and knock all the air out of his lungs.

This time, unlike last time, the power behind your punch and technique is harder so he goes hurdling back and actually skids through the ground until his back hits a tree.

“I never wanted this,” you yell out as you pick yourself up and use RCT to heal what he had broken. “But you got us here! The day you left!” You add and walk to him.

Satoru tries to get up, but you stomp your foot and lift a small pillar of dirt to use it to kick it at him. Albeit he lifts his arm and blocks it, but still some stray pebbles shoot past his face and cut his cheek.

“Now I’m fighting for something bigger than myself,” you continue, making him scoff and roll his eyes—“I fight for my family, for our dream. And for people like you. I hope you understand that,” you mutter and interlace your fingers together. “Domain—”

However, before you can finish the sound of an explosion nearby cuts you off. When you snap your head over to see what it can be—or who it could’ve come from, you see a tall bright purple mushroom-like explosion grow over every building here before a wave of dust and heat rolls out. You manage to drift the debris away with the wind you can manipulate, and once the soft and calm wind from before once again unfurls over your flesh you lower your arm and feel a terrible, gut-wrenching feeling.

Suguru is powerful, but nothing he has can ever make such a big of an impact…

No…no.

“Suguru,” you whisper shakily and feel your legs begin to tremble as that terrible feeling travels all over your body, diminishing your strength to the point you can’t stand.

It can’t be, you were supposed to win. You were supposed to meet up later by that pond. You’re supposed to go home together, you’re supposed to celebrate eleven years of being together, and you’re supposed to go on vacation with your family. It can’t be true, he couldn’t have gotten hurt. None of the logical thoughts your mind is shouting is true, none of the agonizing signs your heart is passing is right. It’s not Suguru.

“Y/N,” Satoru mutters near you now.

You glance at him with your eyes full of tears as the truth creeps in like sour bile. “Just go,” you mutter and drop your eyes on the ground to try and argue against what you just saw, to try and make anything up that counters what you know deep inside. After all, you knew Suguru, you knew the curses he has, and nothing he holds can make such a powerful explosion, you’re after curses that make that impact, so deep inside you know the truth. But you don’t accept it. You can’t.

“Y/N,” Satoru calls out again since he knows the truth too.

“Just go!” You cry out even if deep inside you don’t want him to leave. Not again. Can he sense that? He hesitates for a moment. You hoped he wouldn’t leave.

But he listens and his shadow casted over you vanishes as he walks away. Now you’re alone again, left to think, left to collect yourself.

You just need to breathe. You can’t face the truth of what lies ahead.

He’s Suguru…he’s everything. He’s all you’ve known for the past ten years. He’s all you had, you didn’t let go of each other and built a world for yourselves. You don’t want to let go of your hope, you can’t let go of your world because that’s what he is, your entire world.

“Please,” you plead at the ground. “Please don’t do this to me. I can’t lose again.”

Please, please, please. It can’t be true. It isn’t true. You keep repeating that to yourself as you curl yourself into a ball on the cold ground. You keep pushing the truth away because if you didn't face it it wouldn't happen, right?

You can’t move, you can’t make yourself move until the air actually feels bitter against your skin and you realize that you have to move. That…you need to see him.

However, when you head over to where he might be, you hold onto blind hope that what you know isn’t true. It’s blinding for a moment, but when you find him with your brother. When you see him on the ground with his dark hair down, with blood over his torso, and with his clothes torn and part of his body missing, the world you live in comes crashing down and you know, there’s no escaping it.

“Suguru,” you whisper even though both men had seen you approaching.

He nevertheless drops his head and all you see is a frown on his face as his bangs cover his eyes. You want to cry, you want to scream and hold yourself with your ears covered. But you just let out a shaky breath and go on your knees beside him with a comforting demeanor. Even if your throat is tearing with how badly you want to cry.

“Hey, Sugar,” you whisper.

A small smile tugs on his lips but he continues to avert his gaze. “You know, I always liked when you called me that.”

You grin and nod softly. “I know,” you whisper. “I know you did…can you look at me?”

Suguru sighs and slowly lifts his face, letting you see that he can’t open one eye and that his other eye is gleaming with tears. And the moment he meets your gaze those tears crawl down his face.

“I’m sorry,” he mutters hoarsely. “I'm sorry I couldn't give you the world.”

Your grin falls to a smile as you slowly reach over to cup his cheek. “It’s okay,” you assure him. “You were always enough for me. You gave me all I could have asked for; a good life, a good home, and a perfect family. So you did what you promised. You did.”

Suguru lets go of his shoulder and reaches over to hold your hand. “I love you,” he says softly and holds your gaze with a soft and loving look. “More than anything.”

Your bottom lip trembles and your throat burns more as you keep holding yourself back to comfort him in his last moments.

“You know that right? I love you, y/n.”

You nod. “I do now,” you whisper. “Suguru,” you whimper.

“It’s okay,” he says and reaches over to cup your cheek. “You’ll be okay. You’ll move on from this. You’ll be happy, you’ll find someone else, someone worthy of you, and you’ll have the life you want. And I’ll look out for you every step of the way. Okay?”

Tears roll down and he quickly wipes them away. “Oh my, firefly,” he mumbles and pulls you in to steal a lingering kiss before he presses his forehead against yours. “Be happy okay?”

You want to tell him that it’s impossible without him, that you need him with you to be happy, but you can’t have this last moment be spent arguing, so you just nod and that makes him smile.

“I love you,” you tell him against his lips. “I love you…and I’m happy we met, that we got together. I’m happy I held onto you. I love you Suguru Geto.”

Suguru grins and more tears roll off his cheeks. And it’s now as you both have tears rolling down your faces, and you’re telling each other how much you love each other. It’s in these last moments that Satoru finally sees it, what he never saw in that year you were together during school. He sees the love you share, he sees how deep it is, how genuine it truly is, and he regrets not being happy for the both of you before.

“Can,” Suguru whispers as his eye clouds with more tears. “Can I talk to her one last time?”

The need to sob comes up like throw up, but you don’t let those tears fall, you instead nod and pull your phone out. When you call Belinda, the phone only rings once before there’s an answer.

“Mommy?!” Satori greets excitedly on speakerphone. “Are you coming home?”

You swallow back and shake your head. “Ah, no not yet. Look, your daddy wants to talk to you, okay?”

You push the phone towards Suguru and he smiles softly. “Hey, baby girl,” he greets.

“Daddy!” She shouts excitedly as if she hadn’t just seen him a couple of hours ago. “Daddy, I know where I want to go.”

Suguru chuckles. “Do you? Tell me,” he probes.

“Well,” she says. “The beach so we can go to the arcade and get big stuffies, and then get ice cream. And then we can go to the festival.”

“Festival?” He asks.

“Yeah, you know the big wheel,” she mumbles as she gets lost in thought.

Suguru grins. “The amusement park,” he corrects her.

“Oh…hm, yeah, that.”

“Okay,” he whispers. “That sounds good, it’ll be fun…Look, I love you, you know?”

You pull back and have to turn away to avoid sobbing into the phone, and that’s when you catch the curious gaze of your brother. It’s only now as he listens in that he knows that you have a child. In Suguru’s last moments.

“I love you too Daddy,” Satori redirects clueless to the fact that this was the last time she’d get to tell him.

“I love you so much,” he says one last time. “You be good to your mom and your sisters, yeah?”

“Hm, okay?” She says with confusion. “Daddy when are you coming home? It’s almost bedtime.”

Suguru stays quiet for a moment and when you look back at him more tears are streaming down his face. “Your mom will be there soon, and so will Nanako and Mimiko,” he averts her question. “You can ask them to read you a story, okay? I don’t think I’ll make it, my little love. I'm sorry. Will you forgive me?”

Satori groans, making Suguru laugh.

“I forgive you,” she whispers. “Will you read me one tomorrow?”

Another moment of silence passes before he nods. “I’ll try,” he says as he can’t bring himself to say no or the truth. “Goodnight, my sweet girl.”

“Goodnight Daddy,” she says back before she quickly hangs up the phone.

When the phone goes black Suguru hands it back to you and you put it away before you brush his bangs back and assure him. “We’ll be okay. I’ll take care of us.”

Suguru nods softly before slips his hand off yours and balls his hand into a fist. You watch him with confusion, but he quickly grabs your hand again. Only this time he places the balled-up worm curse that had crawled up to him eleven years ago, and that you both have looked out for ever since then.

“This,” you say and chuckle softly. “This is great. I’ll take care of it,” you assure him.

“He’ll come in handy,” Suguru says.

You hum and since the worm curse makes itself small right now you put him in your pocket. And after he’s away you hold Suguru’s cheek one more time and caress it as you look into his soft dark eye. “I love you, Sugar,” you whisper against his lips

“I love you too,” he redirects softly as he holds your gaze longingly before you lean in and steal one last kiss from his soft and warm lips. He holds your cheek and kisses you back softly.

You don’t want to let go, maybe this way you’ll always live in this moment. And yeah, he’s in pain but at least he’s alive. So you want to stay in the moment he’s alive.

But when you pull back a hand falls on your shoulder and interrupts you.

“Y/N,” you hear your brother whisper.

You shake your head. “No…just a bit longer,” you whisper shakily.

Suguru caresses your cheek. “It’s okay, y/n,” he assures you. “It’s okay. I’ll be okay. Just go home, okay?”

“But. Suguru—”

“It’s okay,” he whispers.

You had talked about letting go when it came to a moment like this. You knew there was no way around it, but being in the moment now is harder to walk away from. You want to stay, you want to fight, but you know you can’t, you have to let go, that’s the truth, so you pull away and stand up to hide behind the wall and let Satoru walk to Suguru.

Finally, you let yourself cry, but you cover your mouth to silence your sob and listen in to the moment Satoru pierces a blade into the chest of the man you love. Because there was no escaping this reality, he couldn’t leave with you after what happened. Your brother wouldn’t have let it happen, so you have to listen in to confirm that he’s really gone.

Once silence falls and you know Suguru’s heart isn't beating anymore you push yourself away from the wall and walk away.

Nevertheless, your brother calls out for you again. “Y/N.”

You stop in your tracks and think he might say something about what happened.

“The curses,” he says instead and disappoints you.

You scoff and pull the bag off your shoulders. You can fight him and at least see this plan through since Suguru couldn’t get Rika, but you have no willpower to keep fighting your brother. You won't win regardless, it’s why you didn’t fight him to take Suguru—that and there was no way he could’ve lived through his wounds, they were too extensive, so you turn and storm over to shove the bag with the Death Painting Wombs, in his hands.

Neither of you anything after that so you walk away with tears streaming down your cheeks. Instead of leaving the school though, you find yourself by the pond in the school. You just can't go home yet, you can’t go home in your state, so you fall on the ground and let yourself cry for the man you loved.

There’s a chance the higher-ups might come after you behind Satoru’s back if they know you’re lingering behind, but you can’t leave the way you are. You can’t even see clearly or at all with how much you’re crying, you can’t breathe, you can’t stand, and it genuinely feels like the world you know is gone. It doesn’t exist, you’ve been sucked into a cold abyss.

You know you should be strong, you have daughters, they’ll need you, and Satori is only five and will barely understand why she won’t ever see her dad again, she’ll need you most of all. But what are you supposed to do without him? How can you keep a shattered heart beating?

Before you could’ve been comforted by the fact that you had your brother, he was the goodness of this world, even when you were apart, but after this? He probably hates you, so you have nothing now.

And you want so hard for your daughters to be something to keep you afloat, you want them to be a light in the void, but right now they’re not enough because it feels like you’ve failed them by not returning home with Suguru. You’ve failed them because you lost again…

But why? Why do you have to lose someone else again? Why do you have to hurt in the worst way possible? You know you’ve done bad things, but do they really require losing your heart? Your world?

You just want to go back to the world you knew only a few days ago. You were all together and happy. You want to go back to when you were in high school, when Haibara was still alive when anything was possible, and when you were all just stupid teenagers. You don’t want to go home to an empty bed. You don’t want to tell your family, and you don’t want to tell Satori.

Why? Why did you have to lose him?

“Why?” You cry out over and over again in frustration, agony, and sorrow until your voice is raspy and it feels like you want to throw up with how hard you’re crying.

And you part your lips to try and throw up, but more tears well in your eyes and your body begins to tremble as a stronger wave of grief hits you. It takes you under and there's no escaping the pressure that keeps pressing you down, that hurts not only your lungs but your entire body, almost like you’re being stabbed by thousands of hot blades.

You try to cry out and relieve yourself of some of that ache, but nothing comes out. You fall limp and just lay on the ground numbly even as the winter wind pinches your skin.

Who knows how long you stay on the ground, you don’t snap back to reality until your phone rings. And when you answer you don’t even know who’s on the other end, you just answer hoarsely. “Hello?”

“Y/N?” Nanako's voice sounds, making you blink repeatedly in disbelief before you sit up and sigh with relief.

“Nanako,” you whisper and feel…hope at the sound of her voice and the knowledge that Mimiko was with her.

You were blind to it before in your grief, but you know deep inside that Nanako, Mimiko, and Satori are still your hope. It’s all still dark, you’re still drowning in the void, but they’re hope.

“Where are you?” You ask.

“Where are you?” She redirects sassily. “We left Shinjuku, we all did. We’re almost home.”

You should go home too. You should tell them at home…but you can’t figure out what to tell Satori, you can’t bring yourself to say it yet. So no, you can’t go home yet.

“I’m still out,” you tell Nanako. “Are you and your sister okay? Is everyone else okay?”

“Yes, we’re all fine,” she says. “Are you? Is Geto?”

You let out a shaky sigh, and stand up to walk to the tree that has the initials of Suguru and you carved on it. Instead of crying, you smile softly, but that doesn’t last long whatsoever because you need to tell the twins that the man who took them in and raised them as his own won’t be coming home ever again. You have to.

“Nanako, is Mimiko next to you?” You ask as you press your forehead against the bark.

Nanako hesitates for a moment as she detects the sadness in your tone. “Yeah…she’s here.”

You nod. “Put me on speaker,” you suggest.

“Okay, you’re on.”

You swallow back thickly before you slowly interject with the harsh truth. “It’s about Suguru…”

——

*LATER*

It’s almost midnight, when is he getting home? Is he coming home? It’d be weird if your brother didn’t come home and you stayed in his apartment for the night. Then again you can’t go home right now.

You said that hours ago, but nothing has changed. There's still nothing you can say to your daughter that will make her father's death sound any easier. Then again…you just say that because you can’t wrap your mind around it yet.

Which is why you’re in your brother's apartment for the night even if he might hate you. Even after your fight, because you need to think and calm down so you can seem strong to Satori, Mimiko, and Nanako. They need you to be strong.

There was also nowhere else to go. You could go to Nanami’s house, but you’ll feel the need to explain why you did what you did, and you can’t do that right now. You could go to a hotel, but you don’t want to be alone. So you came to your brother's place.

Plus, you also hoped that you could finally have Satori and Satoru meet too. Now that Suguru is gone…you need to have a plan just in case something happens to you. And well, he overhead you and Suguru talking to her so you can’t avoid it anymore.

However, he’s still not home and you’re bored.

Thus you grab your hot bowl of ramen and begin to wander around his fancy and expensive apartment. It’s surprisingly clean considering he wasn’t the most organized person as a teenager. And everything in his house is shockingly pretty. He has good taste. And his music selection is amazing; Destiny's Child, Mariah Carey, Boyz II Men, and so many other great artists. You have to put on your favorite and continue to look around, hoping you won’t run into anything gross.

Nevertheless, when you’re snooping around you come across a magazine rack and freeze when you see that all the magazines he has are old and new issues with you in it, and ones with covers you’ve been on. There’s a couple that are of those models or celebrities he likes, but almost all of them on the rack have you.

It makes you want to cry, but all your tears have dried up so you just sigh shakily and walk back to the dinner table. And as soon as you sit down the knob jingles before you hear it open. Your heart begins to race as you begin to get nervous to see your brother, but you don’t show it, you just continue to eat and after a few minutes, he finally appears.

Satoru looks at you with nonchalance, he doesn’t move his arms to attack you, he takes his bandages off and watches you calmly. “What are you doing?” He interjects.

You look up from your plate and point to the food. “Eating. You know you have nothing in your fridge,” you point out and then sigh. “I had to go to the store to get stuff for ramen.”

“I'm hardly home,” he mutters.

You hum and continue. “Well I stocked your fridge, you need to eat more. And there’s some ramen on the stove you must be hungry. You’ll probably have to heat it up though.”

Satoru stays where he is and scoffs softly. “No, I mean what are you doing at my house? Don’t you have some community to get back to?” He clarifies, but you knew that, you were just messing with him.

“Well, sure,” you sigh and let the chopsticks go to sit back. “But I can't go home yet,” you say. “I need to figure out how to break the news, so I’ll be staying the night. Don’t worry I’ll sleep on the couch, I won’t sleep anyway.”

Satoru exhales deeply and finally breaks away from his spot to sit across from you. “You just tried to trap me in a domain and now you broke into my house and made food,” he mumbles.

You snicker and go back to eating. “No,” you counter. “Well, yes I was going to trap you in my domain, but it’s not like you would’ve stayed long in it anyway. I just wanted to show it off mostly because, mhm,” you say as you take a mouthful of food. And once you swallow you keep going. “My domain is pretty cool, we’re like in the middle of a tornado in the middle of the ocean, and fire surrounds us like a barrier, so it’s pretty impressive,” you muse.

Satoru hums in comprehension and sits back to swing his arm over the empty chair across from him. You awkwardly avert your gaze and stand up to grab him a bowl and try to fill the awkward silence. “Your house is surprisingly nice.”

Satoru scoffs. “Why is that a surprise?” He quips.

You shrug as you serve him food. “You were kind of a slob back in the day,” you mention.

“Yeah,” he mumbles. “That was ten years ago. Things change.”

You chuckle and place the plate in the microwave to heat it up. “Yeah,” you agree after. “They do…” you trail off and feel a frown form on your lips as grief hits you hard again as your life flashes in your mind, and as you feel the need to ask why he left you.

However, even as much as you desire to know, now is not the time. So instead you change the subject as you wait for his food. “You don’t have any kind of alcohol in your house.”

“Because I don’t drink.”

You snort and laugh. “You still don’t? Man, you’re almost 30, and with this line of work drinking is better than great.”

Satoru sighs as he stretches the back of his neck. “Yeah, nah, I’m looking out for my physique. The ladies like the way I look.”

You roll your eyes to him and scoff in disgust. “Well,” you ignore his comment and take his bowl out of the microwave. “That’s the great thing about RCT, no damage. It’s why Shoko hasn’t died of lung cancer.”

Satoru chuckles as he watches you not struggle to find more chopsticks in his kitchen. “Well,” he says. “Yeah that’s true, but she stopped smoking a couple of years ago.”

You face him with your eyes wide with surprise as you walk back to the table. “Well that’s good,” you say with a proud smile. “Good for her.”

Silence follows whilst you place his bowl and chopsticks down in front of him, and tension grows between the two of you again. You sit back down again and you both eat in silence. But it’s not something you can really take for so many reasons, so you interject with what you need from him.

“Actually, I also came because I want you to meet someone tomorrow.” You avert your gaze but you can feel his on you. “I know you’ll probably be taken to a ton of meetings tomorrow because of what happened, or you’ll get sent out to missions, so I wanted to get to you first.”

Satoru pulls the bowl to his lips and scrapes the food at the bottom of the bowl into his mouth with his chopsticks and probes. “Who is it? Because if it’s those girls, I’ve already met them. They did good today, you should be proud.”

You smile softly and shake your head. “No, not them. They won’t want to see you anymore. It’s…someone else,” you avoid the truth even though he probably has an idea. “So just be ready for tomorrow.”

You look up at him and he meets your gaze and nods slowly in comprehension. Silence falls again, but neither of you wants to fill it with what just happened, your eyes are already puffy with how much you’ve cried and he can see that so he leaves it be for now. You just continue to act like nothing happened, and like there isn’t a ten-year-long strain in your relationship.

“So,” he interjects, knowing there’s one thing that comforts you. “Do you want to watch a movie?” He asks

You smile and nod. “Yeah, that’ll be cool.”

.

.

.

.

.

A/N- No they didn’t give each other all they got :/ siblings am I right?

Tagged- @deniseabad1928 @secondary-character-25 @starlightanyaaa @notsaelty @d4rno @moonnime

[prinvessdior]

hello, again… I’ve written something about my biggest rivial in life bc he needs to suffer.

anyways hope you enjoy Asmo!!

(A/n: just a heads up! This takes place just a little after jjk 0! So minor jjk 0 spoilers but nothing is actually said just implied. Enjoy! Or try to lol oh and spoilers in tags!)

I’ve seen this before, I think I have at least. This is familiar though. I’ve seen this before.

All of the bloodshed, walking across a field of bodies torn apart. Then up ahead is Jujutsu High I can see the spirits Suguru had released on this night, but it’s different.

Alone, but I wasn’t alone before I remember now.

Then, as I turn my head the scene changes, I’m holding her she’s gone already I can tell I can’t open my mouth to speak nothings coming out. I can barely see her. Why can’t I see her? She’s still bleeding, everything shaking. or is that me shaking.

But this is all too familiar, I just lean down to place my head on hers, closing open eyes, I can’t bear to look in anymore. I just tremble and hold the only thing left.

You’re not used to this sight. A finally peacefully sleeping Gojo Satoru, be it at 3:56 in the morning but asleep no less.

sighing you close the book you were previously reading to relish in the sight for a bit. Starting out running your fingers softly through his hair, pushing it out of his face before moving to cup his cheek. Leaning down to press a soft kiss on his forehead pulling back.

Then, like a fucking horror movie, Satoru suddenly jumps up with a gasp almost bumping foreheads with you. Luckily pulling back just in time to dodge his literal attack.

“Holy Fuck! What was that!?”

Obviously shocked, Satoru gathers his bearings for a moment breathing heavily, you crawl over to him hesitantly reaching out to place your hand on his that was gripping the sheets.

“‘Toru?” You ask, voice coming out softly as to not alarm him.

He says nothing but reaches out to grab you just as hesitantly as if you’re a ghost to him in this moment. He feels up and down your arms, scaling up to cup your face, you tilt your head. This was too concerning especially for him.

As he figures out that you’re alive, you guess, he lets out something between a relieved gasp and sob. He pulls you to him by your head and waist now gripping you like it’s everything he depends on.

He says there for a moment and you let him, just hugging him and rubbing your hand up and down his shoulders and back to try and comfort him. You can hear soft sniffles coming from him, and that’s all you hear before those sniffles turn into soft snores once again.

You maneuver both of you into a comfortably enough laying position given he wasn’t letting you go even fast asleep. Once you pulled the blankets over you both the best you could.

You could see the stains of dried tears on his cheeks and even fresh ones as he just fell asleep. All you could do was hug him close to you and hope this would be enough.

——————————————————————————

tags!: @asmobeuses

shoot me a dm to be added to my tags!

[secondsovereign]

-> SECONDSOVEREIGN: A study in memories, what it means to be a teacher, the regrets of the past, the light of hope and lingering in the shadows so that light shines forever more.

Private and Closed WELT YANG affiliated with @gnostichymns

Viis, He/Him, GMT+0

Icons, spacer and icon frame are mine

Writing Sample / Ask / Comm Season Wanted / Dossier // Primarily contacted through Discord !!

"May all that is beautiful in the world forever shine"

RULES AND REGS

AFFILIATE: Somewhat explanatory, this is a closed and affiliated blog with Gnostichymns, as such I will not be interacting with people outside the group. I Appreciate your understanding

NSFW: The Mun is 25+ so NSFW threads of all varieties will likely happen at some stage. Each Category will be appropriately tagged in 3 variants (nsfw, tw: nsfw or nsfw ;;) so that they’re picked up AND under a read more. THERE WILL BE NO SEXUAL NSFW, NO EXCEPTIONS.

Tagging: Simple Enough, Please Please Please don’t be afraid to approach me about tagging something or even reminding me to tag something if you need it.

Leaks and spoilers: I’m personally fine with leaks, I’m not liable to post them, but I’ve no issue as long as they’re properly tagged. As for spoilers, everything will be tagged with spoilers, tw: spoilers and spoilers ;;

Mun=/=Muse: Pretty self-explanatory, I do not, under any circumstances, condone the ways in which my muse(s) may act or react.

Shipping: It's not a primary focus for Welt, however it requires ample discussion between muns, Welt, despite looking like he's in his late 40s is 80+ years of age, so shared life experience tends to be few and far between.

As a note: Due to the way Hi3 is structured, Welt tends to know and have interacted with most characters, with the sole exception of flamechasers other than Kevin, Su, Griseo and Hua, alongside part 2 characters other than Coralie and Helia. This means he won't be unfamiliar with your muses, due to keeping him as aligned with PRE-APHO canon as possible.

[neonscandal]

"JJK really went from a loved manga to a mid-to-bad story with insufferable fans 🙏 may more of us hate it in the future. It snatches the spotlight from genuinely good shows and its another case of "general shonen fan will call any trash 'goat' if the fight is well animated".

I used to be a fan, until the start of the culling game. And after this controversial, inconsistent and inhumane adaptation of shibuya, im glad that I have no interest in both manga and show anymore"

Do you think Culling Game really that hard to understand? Cause I saw quite a llt got turned off to JJK since that arc....

⚠️ Content Warning (no real spoilers) for the Culling Games arc. Nothing in depth to warrant burying beneath a "Keep Reading" but fair to mention just in case.

I don't know how to say this without generalizing negatively but the sentiments very much sound like they came from a cishet dudebro. I've noticed that shonen series' that have a fanbase made up of vocal queer people and/or womxn fans are widely renowned for their "insufferable fans" and this specifically is applied to JJK and MHA across social media. I wonder why.

From the lack of sexualization of female characters/students, the immediate shutdown that Nobara was going to fall for Yuji or Megumi in typical shonen fashion, the cast of men being curated for the female gaze across the manga and anime adaptation (Gojo, Geto, Nanami, Toji, etc.), the overt queer coding and presence of canonically queer/trans characters... also, the simple fact that the canonically attractive and OP characters aren't insufferable assholes? Maybe that's just a me thing but it seems like these factors have been rubbing certain people the wrong way.

Re: the animation of Shibuya and the practices that delivered the work with such an insane timeline and not to the quality of the team of animators' liking... that's valid. But that is a Mappa shortcoming in an effort to snatch up all the prolific and iconic adaptations they can, not a JJK shortcoming. As such, throwing the baby out with the bathwater there doesn't seem like a particularly sound argument but just a means to pile on.

A/N: As it stands, Mappa held the reigns on AOT's final season (taking over from Wit Studio due to production schedule), S2 of Vinland Saga (taking over from Wit Studio due to production schedule), JJK S1, JJK 0 movie, CSM adaptation of S1, Hell's Paradise adaptation of S1, JJK S2, CSM movie adaptation for Reze Arc, Zom 100... all since 2020 and does not encompass other, smaller series'.

I'll concede, it makes sense that the culling games left a lot of readers lost in the forest, myself included. Not the point of the games since we know, to what end, Kenjaku!Geto hopes to achieve at this point.

I think readers were stymied by how much time was spent on developing unique characters who were offed like.. a chapter later. A necessary evil to maintain the living core cast of characters who would later have to take on the Big BadsTM while also moving along the point system for the Culling Games. It seems like Gege Akutami took their time to cultivate these mini-fights though it wasn't clear to what end from a plot standpoint... yet. Empirically, we've seen small details woven back into the story which didn't seem apparent at the time given the exposition style of the mangaka.

As a reader, I love guessing at the end of stories. You can see the crackpot theories that pepper the Manga With Me tag. But the Culling Game arc spans long enough to lose the plot and make it so much harder to forecast where the story is going. Especially when Gege Akutami generally seems like a troll of a person anyway.

I think the Culling Games happening immediately after the Shibuya arc was a choice. Based on anime only fan reactions to Shibuya, what's to come is not for the faint of heart fans. Especially when you consider the losses suffered in Shibuya are immediately eclipsed by the regular losses and disappointments within the Culling Games. However, as a fan, I'mma let Gege cook even if they're using my tears and angst as seasoning because we haven't seen enough of the story to determine the Culling Game's true place/meaning within it.

I think, story wise, they started off too strong with emphasizing Gojo's overpoweredness. Subsequently, they had to write in caveats and build ways to close the gaps between him and other characters to allow for the story to press forward with or without him. I still don't know how this story is going to end though I think I have a new hypothesis from the last time I guessed at who would survive.

At the end of the day, it's definitely that person's opinion to jump back in once more of the story has been fleshed out should they choose to do so because a lot of people don't like dealing in uncertainties. Whatever they decide, don't let it sway your enjoyment one way or another, anon. ❤️

[the-starry-seas]

yeah i'm watching the borderlands movie, liveblogging-style commentary below

spoiler-free tldr: dedication to aesthetics and easter eggs. a handful of funny lines. about half of them didn't land at all. the lack of blood is rather unforgivable. would've been a 6.5/10 if that exact script was for different brand-new characters. as it is, 3/10 due to the character assassination

no reason for tiny tina to not be blowing the shit out of random things what is this girl doing ??????????????? character assassination

roland kinda gives me bl1 vibes but i'm still not even vaguely sold on hart's casting

probably the only psycho to not be screaming about meat bicycles 0/10 also that jumpsuit just looks... cheap. love the mask though.

wym knox

is that supposed to be a skag?

MARCUS WOOOOOO honestly this guy nailed it good job. though the ponytail... i'm confused. did i just never notice marcus had long hair? (one google later: yeah i'm unobservant as shit)

i don't recall anywhere but the literal actual dump in bl1 looking anything like this. krom is an interesting namedrop though

oh fuck yeah i love seeing robot POV- oh shit they're canonising lilith's last name being cashlin?

oh shit i know that bunty board mission look!!!! nice tbh

this voiceover is. not working for me however.

okay i love everything about claptrap, this is the obnoxious twerp that i know and... tolerate. yeah, let's go with tolerate. "even completely unjustified ones like yours" HAH

yeah lilith i feel that violence/expression combo

i cannot at all understand how the echonot is... a bot-only thing? but then again there's no other reason to have him tag along

OH SHIT I KNOW THOSE CROSSHAIRS

ah those fucking rakk

bunny! i know that bunny! got a booty like POW

LMAO good going tina finally she bears some resemblance to canon

zero reason for lilith to not teleport here but i guess they're saving the siren reveal? for some reason?

"LIKEABITCH" "MY BIG BRUDDAAAA" i kinda like it tbh. she was never going to be tina in a pg-13 movie but this is near-ish enough that i'm not upset

where's krieg during all of this exactly? ah there we go

wilhelm scream!

cgi on teh creature is looking a little shaky

claptrap's dedication to annoyingly singing everything, yeah, it tracks

okay so characterisation is... y'all've heard everyone bitching since the first trailer, right? but tina and krieg BFFs are growing on me and i'd read the fanfic

i'm not over krieg having hair sorry i even googled to make sure he didn't in bl2

SUPERMASSIVE BLACK HOLE

could they not have worn normal masks instead of whatever these glowy cyberpunk things are?

"kriegy give me a ride!" oh they're cute

w. what is moxxi's accent? also why does lilith have mommy issues suddenly

temu tannis. honestly i think the casting for her isn't horrible, and the characterisation isn't as bad as some other characters, but it's still not what i'd expect

i'm not buying eridian clone. do we not remember what eridians look like.

this is supposed to be sanctuary???? geez they had so many other visual things nailed, i don't. get that. arguably one of the most iconic places in the series, idk how it's That

oh shit, caustic caverns?

yeah tina and krieg are everything to me

"hope blooms in the strangest places" coming from tina is the worst, it's a perfectly fine line but from TINA? would've been fine from lilith

i am not buying that knife-throwing action, would it have been so hard to find a stunt guy who knew how to do that already?

an ambush by dozens of enemies sure would be a nice time for some siren powers but tbf that is some pretty smooth gunwork

krieg dragging claptrap up the staircae and hitting every stair along the way LMAO

would it have killed them to have ANY lighting in that hallway

no way on earth did tina just snap a guy's neck

IT'S TIME TO BLEEEED HAHAHA yeah i'll give em that one, nice

at this point i'm wondering if lilith is human. with the characterisation in this movie it would not surprise me if tina was a siren instead. and siren tina could be cool! but c'mon. ah so tina teleported them. yep.

firehawk is what? i mean i don't mind it. but. canon, y'all. then again tina is phasewalking so

oh no way did roland survive that

that certainly is a scene that happened

was this one of the workers' villages that got abandoned when the corporations pulled out? bandits attacked and she got orphaned, sent offworld, and fell in with a violent crowd? that's actually a decent backstory tbh, it's just. not lilith's backstory.

i swear this hole place looks familiar i just can't place which map it's from

oh that miniboss-looking dude has a baller design

OH IT'S THE SYRINGE NOISE WOO

that was dumb as hell, killing knox like that

OH FINALLY SIREN POWERS and looks like rewriting the elevator bit yeah it was phasewalking after all

"you have my word" oh yeah that's valuable

"i have to open it" you could just. teleport them out. like you teleported in. could you not. or just kill atlas.

okay the vault arch building does look pretty neat

FIREHAWK WINGS YES

whatever cgi they're doing with floating lilith... i don't like that.

Do Not Hurt The Tina

Do Not Hurt The Krieg

okay the firehawk shield effects are pretty cool

NOBODY KILLS ME BUT ME YEAH

i will always support kids being able to beat up their abusive parents

ooh hentai

ELLIE AND SCOOTER ELLIE AND SCOOTER ELLIE AND SCOOTER ELLIE AND SCOOTER

i still don't get these shantytown vibes for sanctuary but i do love me some fireworks

glorious meat fiesta

"come onnn do the thing" i love when characters say that and the other character is all naaah but then gives in almost immediately cause they love the person asking

FIREHAWK IN THE SKY ALERT DEEPLY FUCKING COOL

[generationlosscorkboard]

Welcome, Seeker.

Here, we uncover the truth.

I am your guide on this journey of discovery, but for obvious reasons I must remain.... Anonmoys. anonomous. Anatomy. Antonym.

um. you know what I mean.

just- just call me Zero. (they/them pronouns)

Right, lets get solving this mystery together!

(Disclaimers, Tags, Masterpost Link, and Miscellaneous under the cut.)

Disclaimer: This is not an update blog. I may repost update blogs if it's relevant, but overall this is just for theories and trying to unravel the mystery Ran has laid out for us.

Second Disclaimer: I am also not Ranboo, nor affiliated with Ranboo and the Generation Loss Crew. Unless directly from those sources, everything I say is not canon. It's just. Theoretically canon.

Other disclaimer: On this blog we call the writer of Chronicle Zero as Chronos for the sake of clarity between Me and them- why Ranboo WHY

Master Posts:

Gen 1 Details Master Post (constantly updated as I find more stuff)

Masterpost of Everytime The XX's Are Used In Chronicle Zero-

Tag list:

#Generation Loss / #Gen Loss - General tag

#Generation Loss Spoilers / #Gen Loss Spoilers - anything that's recent enough to ruin someone's experience (a month)

#Generation Loss Theory - General theory tag

#chronicle 0 - stuff relating to chronicle 0

#red writing - Information from Official sources (or update blogs reporting from official sources)

#red pin with extra string - Active Theories

#paperball on the floor - Closed/Debunked Theories

#tangled tape - Rambles of varying relevancy

#live or die - Polls, Questions, anything in which I ask for an answer

#audience participation - Submissions, Asks, the like.

#zero talks -anything that's just me talking about whatever. Can also be considered the equivalent of "not an update" tag

#zero thoughts - I tag talk a lot, so this just preludes any of that. always after any of the above tags, as a buffer.

Ranboo, if you happen to be looking over this blog-

I hope you are giggling hysterically at me fumbling my way through this.

-----------

It's not just Matpat, random Youtube commenter!

[majesticbirdonascooter]

thoughts on hell breaks loose

ok y’all i KNOWWW i’m like a month late but honestly this was a strugglebus for me to read, despite being so short. and normally i whizz through SP books in a day or two, but this was just painful to read. 

tagging @facelessxchurch as i promised to be a massive hater (i hope that’s ok!! :’) and that this lived up to your expectations lolol)

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT !!!

starting out with the positives of HBL so i dont look like a COMPLETE hater!! so what i liked:  

the usual SP humour was in there and it’ll never fail to make me laugh

ghastly lore!! finding out about ghastly’s past relationships and his parents!!! 

mev and serpine canonly wearing wigs (& serpine’s wig being snatched) because they may be complete villains but GOD DAMMIT, THEY’RE VILLAINS THAT HAVE AN ✨ AESTHETIC ✨

rima being the best blink-and-you’ll-miss-it new character since phase 1

the saracen vs delicat fight (was hilarious if you look past the chivalry bullshit convo)

seeing mr bliss and meritorious again!!! and just the elders in gen!! they were fucking cool!!

seeing hopeless & him interacting with everyone (we have no choice but to stan) 

dexter vex being dexter vex

now we’re going hater mode and here are all the things i had problems with: 

literally everything else. ok bye

jk 

firstly. where the hell was china/the diablerie???? anyone??? okay now i’ve got that out the way...

terrible writing

Landy’s writing has always been simple but this story is like… simpler than simple. The sentences are also oddly structured and it SEEMS like he tried to give the characters’ speech an old timey vibe but it just comes off as... really awkward sounding.

the battles for this story were unreadable for me, i found myself skipping past them because there was just no substance/detail there, or if there was detail it was just filler (looking at the last fight with the dead men vs mevolent’s gang) 

i just got bored. and i never get bored with an SP book, but 3 chapters in and i left the book for a month before i could read it again, because there seemed to be no plot until the very end.

lack of characterisation

what are the personality traits of ghastly’s mother in this? i couldn’t tell ya. hell, what were the traits of ANY character in this story? what was the point of introducing ghastly’s mum after hyping her up for so many years if you won’t utilise her?

adding onto this, all the characters just read as samey for me, if we took away the names of the characters for dialogue etc i literally would NOT be able to tell who said what, because they all had the same personality.

which brings me to the stone sisters. they had so much potential but they were just SO boring. rapture had 0 personality and i didnt care that ghastly fell in love with her. i don’t even know how he did.

also found it wild that landy is trying to push a (forced) romance between ghastly and rapture. obviously ghastly would have other people he’s interested in before tanith but is it really necessary for a story this short? Like the anselm backstory + his parent’s lore would’ve been enough, the romance didn’t add anything to this shitty story.

valkyrie fuckin’ cain

dear landy, valkyrie cain doesnt have to be in every single story. the plot does not have to revolve around her. this has been a public announcement.

why oh WHY did this bitch rock up out of nowhere halfway through the story? 

in the end it’s not like she even does much. plus if it’s a story ABOUT THE DEAD MEN, keep it about THEM, not her. 

at one part she brags about all of her stupid powers and it’s at this point that i start drinking to forget how awful this story is

most of her conversations are just ripped from the pages of when she spoke to meritorious in the OTHER parallel dimension. what was the point??? 

oh pee pee poo poo angry birds!!!11 

fuck valkyrie cain she should’ve stayed tf out of HBL

other moments from when i live-reacted to this god damn story but can’t be bothered to write about fully:

Already like one page into the book and I feel like the writing is off…? Idk I’ve been reading phase one again recently so mb its just that I forgot what phase 2 writing is like (if HBL is similar writing wise to phase 2?)

Literally two pages in and theres already typos. Someone get this man’s editor an editor.

I dunno I feel like this book is trying too hard but simultaneously not trying AT ALL

Im getting a fucking drink. Maybe that’ll make this bearable.

Im in so much pain reading this book now. And I cant stop cringing. Someone tell me when its over pLEASE

Everyone’s dyng what the fuck

Landy really is obsessed with the “ooo it was all a dream” trope shit and “ooo the timeline that never happened” bullshit huh

And for my final thought:

if the hidden god bullshit is a set up for phase 3 I don’t even WANNA know

[pertinax--loculos]

First Line Tag

I was tagged by @ashen-crest -- thank you so much! ^_^

The rules state: share the first sentence of your last ten stories. If you haven’t written ten stories, share as many first sentences as you have.

So this is fun, because I’m a non-linear writer, so we may have to dive into the archives to find actual first lines. (Spoiler: this was a fun ol’ time. :D) Also, because I have an acute inability to perceive the singular in the word ‘line’, odds are there’s gonna be a few of these where they’re, y’know... lines. Fuck it, we ball.

Not sure who has and hasn’t done this, so randomly picking some people (absolutely no pressure if you don’t like tag games or whatever!): @oh-no-another-idea ​, @indecentpause ​, @kaatiba ​, @kaiusvnoir ​, @idreamonpaper ​, @albatris ​ and @isherwoodj ​!!

Hokay, here we go:

Absent That Night:

Latrell stared at the blank space on the wall, incensed.

ATN2 (sequel to Absent That Night):

This was not the first time Latrell had found a body in the middle of his crime scene.

It was the first time he didn't personally know the victim. So. That was novel.

CASCADE

“So you are aware what the conditions of this agreement are, Mister Johns?”

Jay leaned back in his chair, the chains binding his wrists and ankles clanking. “I’ve been given the pitch, yeah.”

Forgotten Fates

I’m gonna die because of a fucking dretter.

It’s hard to parse what’s happened in the past ten minutes or so. I just know that it’s happened, it’s happened fast, and it’s happened because I didn’t trust my instincts enough to believe what they were telling me about that message.

___RISK IT

Calden Bray was a tricky motherfucker, but fortunately I knew how to handle him.

Out of Containment (OOC)

In his dreams, he’s still there.

He walks down winding corridors that have nothing to distinguish them from the rest. Windowless, with repeating patterns on the carpet and featureless beige walls, there’s no way to tell which direction he’s going. Some latent sense of direction convinces him that they twist and turn, but there’s rarely proper corners. Intersections are even rarer.

Abandon All Hope (aka scifi horror idea)

Maddie woke to screaming alarms.

Nightmare scenario. Literally enough that it took her a few moments to realise that she wasn’t dreaming, that this was actually happening, that she was waking to red flashing lights and mechanical wailing filling her head.

Hindsight

Sometimes I wonder if it would've made more sense to get a prosthesis.

In the Shadows of Stars (now we’re really getting to older stuff, my lord)

The profile that Zayra had compiled narrowed the options down to two places.

They were both bars, both on the seedy side, both fairly well known as the establishment to go to if someone wanted to procure something that wasn’t strictly legal. They were also about as far apart from each other as they could possibly be whilst both remaining on the same planet; one in the towering structure that made up the East Dock, one hidden in the sprawl of the West Dock. And no matter how hard she tried, Zayra could not be in two places at once.

aaaaand Hellbent (lordy 0.o)

"What's the matter Lukas? You're not scared, are you?"

"No," Raleigh lied.

[fragments-of-despair]

Finished chapter 4. I'll keep my thoughts brief. Don't worry. They're mostly positives this time.

Of course, trying to keep it vague enough, but spoilers ahead.

First, the positives.

This was by far the most interesting mystery out of the entire game. The intricacies, the careful planning, the mastermind reveal. All of it worked perfectly. Even when I figured out where it was going, I was still surprised and impressed with the overall solution.

Also, Vivia Twilight?

BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY BEST BOY

I adored his development this chapter and loved how his Forte and personal convictions and worldview influenced the investigation. I can't really describe anything about it without spoiling too much, but like, damn, he's worth the $60 price tag. I can see why the one side NPC fell in love. Vivia is just AMAZING.

Also, this was probably Shinigami's best outing. She was still her usual self, but she also met her match in Vivia, and the overall story really started getting to her in a way the other cases didn't. So when the culprit reveal happened and she reaped the soul, it made sense why it went the way it did. And I found myself getting a bit emotional over this culprit along with all the detectives.

That being said, I'm still rather disappointed in the lack of true comradery between Yuma and the other detectives, as well as the lack of character conflict between the Nocturnal Detective Agency and the Peacekeepers. Most of the characters still feel like they're just kind of there, especially the villains. And that leaves everything feeling rather bare bones without even scraps to nibble on.

It might sound weird, but I think what hinders this game is the fact that you don't really interact with anyone outside of the main mystery and the Gab mechanic, and that mechanic is easy to pass over if you don't find all the statues and don't actively go out of your way to find them all. If they had made Kanai World more of an open box to explore like, say, a Legend of Zelda or Assassin's Creed game, where you unlock certain cases and interact with certain characters based on certain conditions and are encouraged to explore the world, I think I would have found the emotional core of this chapter more hard hitting.

Give me side quests where you go undercover with Desuhiko more and master a relationship meter or something similar.

Give me side quests where you and Halara take on cold cases and you work on paying off your debt to them you incur in chapter 2.

Go on more adventures with Fubuki to unlock certain districts in Kanai Ward and learn more about the outside world.

Give me lore based adventures with Yakou and Vivia, who are supposed to have this strong bond based on the emotional core of this chapter.

And make it so that your choices can affect how you go through the Mystery Labyrinth in the main story chapter. Have the Master Detectives come with you and actually have them help more with the investigations in there because as it stands, the only ones who really justified being there were Vivia and Halara, but that had to do more with the story rather than the gameplay.

I really, really want to love this game, but overall it feels empty. It easily could have been an 80-120 hour game if given the time and resources, and I feel like it would be all the better for it.

Hopefully chapter 5 sticks the landing because from my understanding, it's the final chapter, and I'm really hoping that it keeps improving where chapter 4 left us.

Overall, if I had to rank all of the chapters so far from best to worst, it'd look something like this:

Chapter 4: The Imperfect Insider

Chapter 2: A Silent Curtain Call

Chapter 0 and Prologue: Massacre on the Amaterasu Express/the WDO vs Amaterasu Corperation

Chapter 1: The Nail Man Killings

Chapter 3: No Longer a Detective (Chapter 3 curse lives on)

To be honest, I think I would have gladly waited another two or three years for Rain Code if it were filled with more than what we got.

As of right now, the only reasons I would say to get this game as is would be because of Yuma, Halara, Vivia, and the music. Otherwise, it might be better to wait until it's on sale.

Here's hoping chapter 5 stays on the upward trajectory and sticks the landing.

[jellojolteon]

I can just feel the internal fantasy that had to have happened here

[tatakaeeren]

Gojo's Smile is my everything 💖

[perditus-a]

|| just saw the JJK movie and. 1. Ow my feelings. 2. They really just pushed Shoko in to irrelevancy like that ?? Like for real I think that’s the one part of meh writing ? ||